On Christmas day I received a phonecall from my father in Liverpool, back in Sydney. We talked briefly and, though he was dying, he seemed concerned that I was now so ill. His last words to me were, "I will call you. I promise." He never did call me again and that was the last time I ever heard his voice.
The first few months in 2004 were spent housebound with the severe symptoms associated with CFIDS. I lost my ability to even wash my hair without pain and exhaustion. I forgot how to read and write and even driving the 4WD, which was an automatic, with all the floaters that were in my eyes, had become risky. At night I twitched and jerked involuntarily while covered in a layer of sweat. In the morning I remained exhausted through hours of nausea and dry retching. These proved to be long days that turned into even longer nights. I was often light-headed and the migraines increased in intensity and lasted for five days at a time. The only thing left to do was to lie down and endure the pain for days and nights, that turned into weeks, then into months, and finally into years. But as often occurs with a long term disease such as CFIDS, there remained these small 'windows of opportunity' where symptoms would abate, in order that I might attempt to regain some kind of life.
I eventually lost contact with Andrea from the CFIDS Support Group during 2003. But I rang her again in 2004. Andrea had suffered from CFIDS for eight years. She said that she had been amazed when I had walked into the support group, in that I seemed to deal so well with what I was going though. She said, "Most people don't cope with CFIDS in the same way that you do. It's as if you have been disabled all your life!" I saw Andrea on and off and began to pick her up, so that we could do our fruit 'n veg shopping each Sunday at the Rapid Creek Markets.
Andrea was a scientific school teacher type who was sceptical about most things. But she kept an open mind about the odd things I was going through and ended up being a witness to some of them. Aside from the moment to moment struggles with the symptoms of CFIDS, my entire reality was being shaken up with the 'goings-on'. So I loved to talk about it with anyone who'd listen, especially when anything new or unexpected happened. With only the dogs and I now living at Ridgehaven Circuit, things began to occur on a regular basis.
At around 8.30pm on 1st January in 2004, I was lying on the queen-sized bed in the main bedroom reading a book. I was thinking, I am maintaining a positive attitude. Sometimes I'm probably a bit too hard on myself. The light on the wall dimmed up and down twice as if affirming this thought. I kept reading in order to keep my mind off it and the light dimmed twice again.
I thought, when the 'angelic beings" came into my body, it was as if the 'phenomena' was the most natural thing in the world. With that thought, the light dimmed again. I knew that the house was 'haunted' and, while I felt scared, it seemed to be a nice haunting, far from the kind of things that I had read about in the past. I often felt the lights were telling me when I was on the right track, or at other times looking after me, affirming my thoughts, reminding me of something I had to do, telling me to go to bed when I was tired, or simply 'happy' when I got home.
The lights had begun to flicker on and off over the top of my head in the supermarket as well. It only occurred when these 'angelic beings' seemed to enter my body. The supermarket freezers in Woolworths started making loud 'banging sounds' when I was shopping and once or twice a product fell or flew off a shelf as I walked past. On one occasion the deep freezer had banged at least six times somewhere inside the interior wall, while I was searching for a packet of frozen vegetables.
