today nola hands me the cup of english breakfast
tea & shows me a photo of herself/ she said 'this
is when i was six/ my eyes were saying hello to
the world/ now that i am thirty my eyes are saying
goodbye'/ we lean back into the loungechair in
black/ this depression has made me groggy/ i
spoke about my relationship with the cop/ & my
inability to truly hate/ even those fuckwits that
dish it out/ those laboratory rats like lean cuisine/
or vivisectors that spit on the foreheads of the
animals they have mutilated/ if i could truly hate/
as hate i should/ i would hate them/ the breed
called 'the laboratory technician'/ but i said 'you
know'/ i said 'no matter what he did/ it didn't wear
off/ i loved him like i loved my parents/ like i loved
my dog that fell into the grass/ like my childhood
house number sixty six/ my feelings for him didn't
dwindle/ i only numbed myself on certain levels/
like an old department store/ compartmentalised/
storing power for later/ lighting up & switching
off/ it is very hard to destroy love/ in the person
who is abuse tolerant'/ how long does it take to
kill love?/ or the feelings of love that someone has
for you?/ a woman, a man, an animal or a child?/
some children are easily destroyed with one blow/
whereas a kitten or a dog in a human orientated
society comes back/ its tail wagging with that silly
weak grin on its face/ then another dog will snarl
& run away/ if you want to find the abused dogs &
cats go to the lost dogs home in north melbourne/
down the backs of the pens are the dogs are insane/
dogs that have no chance of a new home/ the last
thing they will see is a poisoner's hand/ reaching
down to remove the collar/ & pat the head a couple
of times for the camera/ they will be extinguished
like a small fire/ wiped off the face of a society that
bred them to destroy them/ what do you do for a
living?/ well i'm a dog poisoner/ here we cure the
problem we don't prevent it/ & you can smell it on
my fingers/ now i need to express my grief/ so i
develop empathy with underdogs/ drink cups of
tea with wounded friends/ visit the lost dogs home
in the industrial wasteland of north melbourne/ find
destroyed animals to represent myself
